10 Things You Think About Bisexuals which are not true

"At least when you are bisexual, you do not have to deal with all the bad things gay people have to go through."

  We are happy that you want to assure us that our life will not be so difficult, but it happens that you do not know what you are talking about. We deal with homophobia, and many other horrible things.

Bi-phobia is very real and very alive. For example, sixty percent of bisexual people report hearing jokes and anti-bisexual comments at work. In fact, our statistics show that we are worse off than gay people. Alarmingly, although gay men are four times more likely than heterosexual men to seriously consider suicide throughout their life, bisexual men are almost six and a half times more likely, and while suicidal thoughts tend to decrease as the person passes From adolescence to adulthood, recent studies show that this is not the case for bisexuals.

  So it's not surprising that we are actually tired of being told we have it easier than gays.

"It's normal to be confused about your sexuality."

  If someone tells you that they are bisexual, they have told you that they are not confused, they have told you that they know what they are. Bisexuality can be a confusing subject for you, but not because bisexuals are confused, it's because you are.

  When you tell us that it is okay for us to be confused, you are not only denying that we know what we feel, but also denying that bisexuality is a legitimate sexual identity.

 "It's so cool you're bisexual!"

  Well yes, it may be pretty cool for us, but in reality, it's part of who we are, not because we're trying to be fashionable or looking for attention, and we resent the fact that you're implying that's what it's all about.

  Anyway, we'd rather you do not make our sexuality sound exotic, like some pink crystal from Tibet or something. This implies that we are so different from other people. Sure, we like more of a genre, but we still have to brush our teeth and take out the trash just like you.

  Well, we have the super invisibility power, but it's not really as romantic as you think.

  Good try to be a good person, but you make us feel a bit like creatures from another planet in search of attention.

"In truth, everyone is bisexual."

  What are you talking about? To say that everyone is bisexual is like saying that no one is bisexual, and that we should identify ourselves as gay or straight as they are all bisexual as well.

  If you think that everyone is bisexual, you should think a little stronger about your own sexuality, because you should see it reflected in you. The truth is that if you identify as gay or heterosexual and say that everyone is bisexual, we start to ask ourselves if you are bisexual and you are not ready to admit it yet.

  If you are sure that you are not bisexual, then stop saying that everyone is, because that messes up our realities and minimizes our problems.

 "It's fun to experiment before you settle down!"

  Hooray, experiment! Hey, hey! DO NOT! This is not games and fun for us. It is our lives. Additionally, it is not something temporary that we do until we find the perfect match. If we decide to settle down with someone romantically, we will remain completely bisexual, even if we are in a monogamous relationship.

  Do not turn our sexual orientation into some frivolous nonsense for which we need your blessing. Take us seriously if you want us to take your support seriously, but give yourself 30 lashes for insulting us, and do not speak to us again until you have read 30 articles on BiNet USA's Facebook page.

  From heterosexual men to bisexual women: "I am so drawn to women that I can not blame you for being attracted to them as well."

  Blame us! Who even considers this? Why has that thought crossed your mind? Obviously, you are having difficulty reconciling with your own sexuality.

  Additionally, you are saying that perhaps you have a problem with bisexual men, because you are not attracted to men. Is the sexuality of any person only acceptable if you can directly identify with it?

  Sit on a hill and meditate a little on this, then come back to me and tell me that you accept us for who we are because, well, that is who we are, and well for us for not trying to be someone we are not.

"It's probably best if you do not tell anyone about your gay side and just marry someone of the opposite sex, you know, so you can live a normal life."

  It's hard to see that maybe you're trying to help, when we're busy trying to resist the urge to tear our hair out, or yours, in response to this intolerant ignorance. It is no advantage living a lie. We are honest with you because we want to be our authentic form, because any advantage we receive by hiding our being has the price of dying a slow emotional agony.

  Also, if you think it's easy to turn off the feelings we have for a person because their gender lends

  itself to a "normal" life, think twice.

  Worst of all, is that with this comment, you have shown that you think that being bisexual is not "normal". Perhaps what you really mean is that it would be easier for you if we kept our feelings hidden.

 "You are bisexual? Oh that's OK."

  Although the feeling seems positive, the message really is not. The fact is, we do not need you to tell us it's all right; we already know. You should not need to say it's okay if you think it really is. Obviously, to some degree you have problems accepting our sexual identity.

  If you discover that a person likes to read novels, would you say "oh, alright"? Of course not, because of course it's fine. This is how you should feel about when someone tells you that they are bisexual. You just have to listen and accept without question.

"How exciting! Man, I bet you have the best sex! Do you want to join my wife and me? "

  If you and your wife are very attractive, there are some of us who might consider joining, if only you'd been less disgusting to ask.

  But many bisexuals would feel repulsed and offended by such a proposition. Many bisexuals are not interested in triplets or more people in sexual relationships and there are some within us who do not have much, or especially interesting, sex.

  The fact is, some gay people and some heterosexuals like to have more than two people in bed, and some do not - it's the same for bisexuals. Assuming we would like to receive an invitation like this from anyone at any time, it makes us feel disrespectful and dirty.

  Do not let the representation of bisexuals in the pornographic industry distort our reality. Have the decency to talk to us about the same basic civility that you would automatically offer to anyone else.

 "How lucky for you, as Woody Allen says, 'Being bisexual doubles the chances of having a date on Saturday night.'"

  Lucky for the bisexuals living in the fantasy life you have you and Woody Allen. But from us who live in the real world, thank you for reminding us how difficult it is to date someone when you are bisexual.

  Because the biphobia that calls us treacherous and indiscreet is so unbridled, to be bisexual rather than multiply the chances of being rejected. While you're busy congratulating yourself on your witty and supportive commentary, we're going to see how many messages with "I would never date a bisexual!" Are waiting for us on OK Cupid.

  Anyway, check your math. Only a small percentage of men are interested in hanging out with other men, so a man who is bisexual can not have twice as many opportunities as a heterosexual man to get a date.

  By the way, we've heard it a thousand times.